This Woman's Work
by esirrahc
Summary: Post Facade--after THE GARAGE HUG
1. Default Chapter

**Title: This Woman's Work**  
Author: sydofthesea  
Summary: Takes place after 3.15 – Façade, starts off from their hug.  
Spoilers: S3  
Ship: Sydney/Vaughn  
Disclaimer: the characters in this fic are JJ's, not mine.  
Note: This fic is in script format however it's extremely basic and doesn't contain many of the technical details. It's also inspired by Kate Bush's song, This Woman's Work. The lyrics work so well for Syd's situation that I just had to write a fic around it. This was my first fanfic, so please bear with me.  
  
_Pray God you can cope.  
I stand outside this woman's work,  
This woman's world.  
Ooh, it's hard on the man,  
Now his part is over.  
Now starts the craft of the father.  
  
I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.  
I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.  
  
I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.  
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking  
Of all the things I should've said,  
That I never said.  
All the things we should've done,  
That we never did.  
All the things I should've given,  
But I didn't.  
Oh, darling, make it go,  
Make it go away.  
  
Give me these moments back.  
Give them back to me.  
Give me that little kiss.  
Give me your hand.  
  
(I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.  
I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.)  
  
I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.  
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking  
Of all the things we should've said,  
That were never said.  
All the things we should've done,  
That we never did.  
All the things that you needed from me.  
All the things that you wanted for me.  
All the things that I should've given,  
But I didn't.  
Oh, darling, make it go away.  
  
Just make it go away now._  
  
**1  
**  
INT. CIA PARKING GARAGE – EVENING  
  
Syd and Vaughn are still locked in their embrace, she slowly backs away...  
  
SYDNEY  
Vaughn...  
  
VAUGHN  
Shhhhhh....it's ok. WE'RE ok.  
  
SYDNEY  
But Vaughn...  
  
_He puts an index finger to her lip and slowly wipes away her falling tears with his thumb. She looks at him with such adoration in her face and this breaks his heart because he feels undeserving of such devotion from her. She notices his rueful look and immediately breaks their gaze as she steps back a little._  
  
SYDNEY  
I'm...I'm sorry Vaughn...I don't know what came over me  
  
VAUGHN  
It's ok. Don't apologize. [beat] I understand...  
  
SYDNEY  
It's just that it's been such an emotionally exhausting day.[beat] I found out that Ryan's brother was the man the Covenant had me kill...and then having to negotiate with him for your life while hiding my guilt...and his deceiving us and my naivete believing he'd actually help...and dad killing him...and  
  
VAUGHN  
Seriously Syd, you don't have to explain. I UNDERSTAND.  
  
_She lets out a dejected sigh and hangs her head and nods with her eyes close. He hasn't seen her look this vulnerable in such a long time and instincts tell him to just take her in his arms and shower her with kisses and tell her that everything will be ok. But he knows better.  
_  
VAUGHN  
Come here  
  
_He takes a step closer to her and takes her back in his embrace. Vaughn can feel her crumbling in his arms as she lets out more tears and a silent whimpering that tear at his heart's strings. He strokes her hair with one hand, while rubbing small, comforting circles around the small of her back with the other. He does this for what seems like ages to both of them.  
_  
VAUGHN  
We should probably get you home  
  
_Sydney backs away from the warmth of his embrace and starts to fish through her pockets for her car keys_  
  
SYDNEY  
You're probably right. It's been a long day  
  
_She finds her keys and takes them out...fidgeting with them in her hands. She gives him a half smile and he mirrors her gesture_  
  
SYDNEY  
Vaughn, thank you.  
  
_Another tear grazes her cheek and she quickly wipes it away with the back of her hand and gives him a very sincere and full-dimpled smile. He looks at her in awe._  
  
VAUGHN  
I didn't do anything  
  
_He puts both hands in his pockets and looks down giving one of those famous Vaughn longing look. It hurts Sydney to have him so close and yet so far away. She knew she had to get out of there before her heart betrays her and makes her do something she'll regret later on.  
_  
SYDNEY  
We both know that's not true.  
  
_She gives him another smile and turns around to open her car door. He walks next to her where she can see him from her side  
_  
VAUGHN  
Maybe it's not a good idea for you to be driving home like this. [beat] _{nervously} _I...I can take you to your place and you can just leave your car here for the night  
  
_Sydney is surprised by this offer and from the look on Vaughn's face, he too was clearly surprised by the suggestion he just made. She looks down and then looks at him straight in the eyes._  
  
SYDNEY  
Thanks for the offer Vaughn, but really I'm ok...just...emotional. It'll pass. Besides, Dixon and my dad are waiting for your debriefing about Sark's capture. You should just get it over with and head home. You need the rest just as much, if not more than me. I'll be fine and besides, you've already done your duty...you've diffused the Bristow ticking time bomb.  
  
_She says the last statement half-joking and half serious. This concerns him and he takes a step closer to her and looks at her square in the eyes...a look that's so serious and yet so gentle._  
  
VAUGHN  
I never saw you as a duty, Sydney  
  
_His utterance of her whole name suddenly makes her heart skip a beat._  
  
VAUGHN  
Besides, even in your most emotional state, I'd hardly call you a ticking time bomb. A hurricane maybe, but not a time bomb  
  
_This elicits a chuckle from her and she is once again smiling her gorgeous smile. He returns the favor with his own set of dimples, but his face quickly turns serious once more._  
  
VAUGHN  
But seriously, Dixon and Jack can wait till later. I'm sure they won't mind if I just took you home really quick.  
  
_Sydney is surprised by his insistence, but she knew that having him bring her home would just make it harder for her to leave his presence.  
_  
SYDNEY  
I'll be ok, Vaughn. I promise. I'm just gonna drive home, draw myself a bath, maybe have a glass of wine and [beat]...and just try to forget about this day. But thanks for the offer and [beat]....and I'm glad you made it home safely.  
  
_She gives him a gentle squeeze on his arm and with that, she enters her car and drives away, leaving him behind in the parking lot watching her take off with the saddest of expressions on his face._  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**2**  
  
INT. THE ROTUNDA  
  
_Vaughn walks in with an exhausted expression on his face and Weiss sees him and walks towards his buddy._  
  
WEISS

Hey man, you look like hell.  
  
_Vaughn gives him a smirk and Weiss continues to babble_  
  
WEISS

Which still works for you by the way cuz you get that serious smoldering look the chicks love. But seriously, considering you almost died on that plane with Sark, it's good to see you...hell looking and all  
  
_Weiss gives Vaughn a sympathetic pat on the shoulder and Vaughn acknowledges his sincerity with a small smile. He then pulls up his chair in front of his computer and sits down_  
  
VAUGHN

Is Jack and Dixon ready for me?  
  
WEISS

I don't know, last I saw those two was when Syd was heading out  
  
_Vaughn gets a look at the mention of Syd's name. Weiss notices and approaches the subject cautiously_  
  
WEISS

I don't know if you want to hear this, but she was really worried about you man. When Ryan screwed us because he found out that she was Julia Thorne and was responsible for killing his brother, she just about lost it. You know Syd, always blaming herself for everything...even psycho losers like Ryan  
  
_Vaughn sighs and looks down_  
  
VAUGHN

That's Syd alright.  
  
WEISS

Hey..[beat]...about before...about asking how your marriage was [beat] ...I should've made sure that no one was around. And by no one, I mean Sydney. Sorry for being an ass.  
  
VAUGHN

It's ok. You can't help it  
  
_Weiss chuckles a little...relieved that his friend is able to make light of the situation. Weiss was about to return the favor and make fun of Vaughn even more when Vaughn cuts in_  
  
VAUGHN

I saw Syd in the parking lot. When I was pulling up, she was standing in front of her car door. [beat] She was crying.  
  
_Weiss didn't know what to say and gave Vaughn a look that motioned for him to keep going  
_  
VAUGHN

As soon as I got out of my car, I started to walk towards her and she turned around...  
  
**FLASHBACK**  
  
_Syd turns around to see Vaughn walking towards her with a concerned look on his face. She couldn't believe that he was there...just when she was feeling so lonely and alone...there he was. Her guardian angel._  
  
SYDNEY

Vaughn...  
  
VAUGHN

Come here  
  
_They float towards each other...hugging each other with all of their might. Nothing else mattered. He was there for her and she was there for him. They gave each other strength. So much had gone on in the last 48 hours and that moment was all that mattered. In those 2 days, what it ultimately came down to was them. THEY'RE what mattered. Just like the night when they took down sd-6...two years culminating into one passionate and love-filled kiss. That's what the hug had felt like for both of them.  
  
_**end FLASHBACK**  
  
WEISS

Wow  
  
_Vaughn looks up at his friend's dumbfounded expression and gives one of his own  
_  
VAUGHN

Yah  
  
WEISS

You should've driven her home man. You guys obviously needed to be around each other after everything that's happened these past couple of days. And maybe it would've been a perfect opportunity for you guys to talk. Uninterrupted. With Lauren being gone and all...  
  
_Vaughn cuts him off  
_  
VAUGHN

And say what exactly? [beat] That I'm in love with her and that she's in love with me...but there happens to be that minor thing about my being married to another woman. YAH. There really isn't much to talk about Weiss. We know the shitty situation we're in. Believe me. We know.  
  
_Weiss looks at Vaughn a little irritated by his sarcasm  
_  
WEISS

Then what the hell are YOU doing about it? You keep saying that you know the shithole you're in, but do you do anything to dig yourself out? Like I said before, if you think I'm gonna tell you to stay in a loveless marriage, you're looking at the wrong guy, but I'm also not gonna tell you to leave your wife for another woman.  
  
_Vaughn is also starting to get a little annoyed. He really didn't want to be discussing his situation with Weiss right now._  
  
VAUGHN

You're a lot of help  
  
_Weiss was about to respond to Vaughn's statement when Jack comes out of nowhere and clears his throat. Vaughn and Weiss give each other an uneasy look before Vaughn turns his attention to Jack_  
  
JACK

Director Dixon and I ready for you now Agent Vaughn. Perhaps you and Agent Weiss can continue your banter after you've debriefed us  
  
_Vaughn gives Jack a perplexed look, wondering how much of their conversation he had heard. Jack, stoic as ever, just walks off into the conference room. Vaughn follows his lead and gives Weiss a "damn, we've just been caught" look. Weiss offers his friend a sympathetic smile and a pat on the back as he heads off to his debrief with Jack and Dixon.  
_  
INT. THE ROTUNDA CONFERENCE ROOM  
  
_Vaughn enters the conference room where Dixon and Jack are already seated. He picks a seat across from both men and begins his debrief. After he had detailed everything that went on in the plane and Sark's capture, Dixon and Jack got up and started to head out._  
  
DIXON

Good job Agent Vaughn. You really did phenomenal work considering the situation. But then again, I expect nothing less from you. Considering the recent events, I suggest you take tomorrow off. I've already given Jack, Sydney, Marshall, and Weiss the day off as well. This office can use a recharge. You can hand in your report when you get back. That will be all. And again, good job Vaughn.  
  
_Vaughn gives Dixon an appreciative nod as he steps out. As Vaughn was about to head out himself, Jack clears his throat once more to get Vaughn's attention._  
  
JACK

May I have a moment with you before you leave Agent Vaughn?  
  
_Vaughn is a little nervous, but agrees._  
  
VAUGHN

Of course Jack. What can I do for you?  
  
JACK

Let me preface this conversation by saying that everything I do is in the interest of protecting my daughter. With that said, I know you think that I feel the need to protect her from you.  
  
_Vaughn is about to interrupt when Jack cuts him off  
_  
JACK

Let me finish Agent Vaughn. As I was saying, I know you must believe that I'm trying to protect her from you. You can deduce as much from our last conversation regarding Sydney. I told you to stay away from her. To be cruel to her if you must. I know that you understood. If nothing else, Sydney's well being was always something we could agree upon  
  
_Vaughn looks down and nods. He suddenly remembers how mean and distant he was being to Sydney all of those weeks. Jack notices Vaughn's distraction, but continues on  
_  
JACK

I also know that a lot has changed since North Korea. I know you care very deeply for my daughter, Agent Vaughn. One might say you even love her. And I know that Sydney harbors very strong feelings for you as well. That was evident today when she thought she'd lose you on that plane. I respect the situation you're in, but even you must know that regardless of what decision you make, someone will get hurt. Stop prolonging the inevitable. Either way, I just want my daughter to be able to move on with her life. Are we understood?  
  
_Vaughn was having a hard time processing everything. He knew Jack meant well. He knew all too well that either way he'd hurt someone...hell, he knows that no matter what, HE'd get hurt. He knows it rests all on him. He lets out a long defeated sigh and finally turns to Jack's intent gaze.  
_  
VAUGHN

I understand Jack.  
  
_With that, Jack leaves a distressed Vaughn alone inside the conference room. _


	3. Chapter 3

**3**  
  
INT. SYDNEY'S APARTMENT – LATER THAT EVENING  
  
_When Sydney arrived home, she quickly changed out of her clothes and drew herself a bubble bath. She poured herself a glass of Shiraz, lit some candles in the bathroom and soaked in the tub for an hour. When she started to feel the water get cold and her skin start to wrinkle, she sighed and decided that she eventually had to get out of her haven. As soon as Sydney washed up and stepped out of her bath, she felt as she did when she left Vaughn's embrace earlier that evening...alone._  
  
SYDNEY

You can't keep doing this to yourself Syd. You have to snap out of it.  
  
_Great, now she's resulted to talking to herself, she thought. She changed into a pair of brown silk jammies that were shorts with a matching button down top. She had bought it a week after she came back from the dead...a little gift to herself because she liked how they made her skin feel. She went out to the living room, grabbing her glass of wine and a book off of her nightstand as she headed out. As soon as she plopped herself on the couch, she took a sip of wine and decided that the apartment was too quiet for her. She got up and rummaged through the CDs that Weiss had given her. She found a burnt CD that said SLOW JAMS_  
  
SYDNEY

Wonderful. Just what I needed. What the hell...misery loves company.  
  
_Sydney puts the CD into her CD player and situates herself on the couch once more. As she was about to open her book, Kate Bush's voice fills her apartment. Sydney is still...just listening to the words.  
  
_**Pray God you can cope.  
I stand outside this woman's work,  
This woman's world.  
Ooh, it's hard on the man,  
Now his part is over.  
Now starts the craft of the father.  
I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.  
I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left.  
**

_If only that were true, she thought.  
_

**I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.  
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking  
Of all the things I should've said,  
That I never said.  
All the things we should've done,  
That we never did.  
All the things I should've given,  
But I didn't.**  
  
_Santa Barbara, double dates with Will & Francie, meeting his Mom...saying I love you. Her mind is suddenly filled with things that were taken away from her and Vaughn...things that never were...because she was gone. Because she was dead._  
  
**Oh, darling, make it go,  
Make it go away.  
Give me these moments back.  
Give them back to me.  
Give me that little kiss.  
Give me your hand.**  
  
_God, how I wish he could make it go away, she thought. Sydney is sobbing now and she doesn't know when the tears started falling. She takes the last sip of her wine and decides she needs something stronger. She goes towards her bar and grabs herself a bottle of vodka that she and Weiss stashes just for such a night. She pours herself a shot and raises the glass_  
  
SYDNEY

This is for what could have been, but never was. This is to you Vaughn.  
  
_With that, she downed her drink and she nearly drops her shot glass when her doorbell rings._  
  
SYDNEY

Who the hell can that be?  
  
_She looks at her clock and it's 1:00 o'clock in the morning. She figures that it's probably Weiss coming to check on her. Only Weiss would come over at such an ungodly hour without calling first. The song continues to waft through her apartment as she started towards the door._  
  
SYDNEY

I'm coming Weiss! You've got great timing. I could use a [beat]...  
  
_She opens the door and finds an unlikely person standing on the other side  
  
_SYDNEY

...drinking partner. [beat] Vaughn, jesus, what are you doing here? It's 1 o'clock in the morning. Is everything ok? Did they have problems securing Sark? Did the  
  
_Vaughn interrupts Sydney before she could go on with her inquisition_  
  
VAUGHN

Syd, everything is fine. In a manner of speaking. And HI to you too.  
  
_He looks at her bloodshot eyes and notices that she's been crying. Still, even in her distressed state, she is the most beautiful woman he's ever laid eyes on. His heart breaks seeing her like this.  
_  
VAUGHN

Are you ok?  
  
_Sydney looks at him puzzled and realizes what she must look like...puffy faced from crying with hair haphazardly swept up in a ponytail. She wipes her face and tucks some loose hair behind her ear in that Sydney way that Vaughn always loved.  
_  
SYDNEY

I'm fine...I just...[beat]...I got a little carried away with the song that's playing right now. It was one of Weiss's CD. I didn't figure him for the sappy type. Who knew!  
  
_She looks down a little embarrassed and still confused as to why Vaughn is there._  
  
SYDNEY

Vaughn...[beat]...what are you doing here?  
  
_Vaughn is now fixated on her floor mat as he fumbles around for an answer  
_  
VAUGHN

I...uh...[beat]...after the debrief with Dixon and your father, I was just sitting in the conference room for a while and didn't want to go home. Eventually, I was kicked out because they needed the room, so I left the rotunda, got into my car and just drove. And..[beat]...well...  
  
_He looks at her clearly confused face and he gives her a small smile._  
  
VAUGHN

And then I ended up here.  
  
_Sydney offers him a small smile of her own and it took all of her courage to utter the next few words_  
  
SYDNEY

Would you like to come in?  
  
_Vaughn smiles, but his smile quickly fades into guilt as he reluctantly answers her invitation_  
  
VAUGHN

I would like that. Thanks  
  
_Sydney steps aside and allows him into her home. Once he's inside, she closes the door behind her and turns around to find Vaughn eyeing her place._  
  
VAUGHN

So this is where you live  
  
SYDNEY This is where I live  
  
_The moment is not lost on them. They both realize that this is the second time Vaughn is seeing Syd's place for the first time. Sydney is suddenly bombarded of memories of the first time...their small talk about her couch, how he kissed her as he admired her place. Sydney was hit with nostalgia and started to tear up. She had to leave._  
  
SYDNEY

Would you excuse me for a moment Vaughn, I need to go get my contact lenses off. I've had them on for too long and they're bothering me. Have a seat and make yourself at home, I'll be right back  
  
_She's lying. And he knows it. In a way he's glad she left the room, because he wouldn't know how to excuse himself as he too was feeling choked up by the irony of the moment. They're both back to where they started. After the first kiss during the sd-6 take down, he was over at her home the following day. Now, what seems like a lifetime later, after their intimate hug that competes in passion with their first kiss, he finds himself once again in her home. But everything is different now. The world is turned inside out and fate has been cruel. Still, he feels exactly as he did that first time. In love with Sydney Bristow. Vaughn takes a deep breath and sits himself down on her couch._  
  
VAUGHN

Get a grip of yourself Vaughn. You have to get through this.  
  
_As he sits and waits for Sydney to come out, he gets an earful of the song that's been playing on repeat in the background  
_  
**All the things that you needed from me.  
All the things that you wanted for me.  
All the things that I should've given,  
But I didn't.  
Oh, darling, make it go away.  
Just make it go away now.  
**  
VAUGHN

I'd do anything to make it go away Syd. You have to believe that_.  
  
Vaughn buries his face in his hands as Sydney comes out of the bathroom looking a little more refreshed_  
  
SYDNEY

Did you say something Vaughn?  
  
_Vaughn is jolted back to reality and stands up  
_  
VAUGHN

Yes. I mean no. [beat] I talk to myself sometimes  
  
_He looks down clearly embarrassed by the admission. She smiles a little inside, knowing full well she does the same thing._  
  
VAUGHN

You caught me.  
  
SYDNEY

I'm sorry to startle you. Have a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?  
  
VAUGHN

A bottled water if you've got it.  
  
_Sydney starts towards the kitchen and opens the refrigerator, taking out a bottle of water. She walks over to Vaughn and hands it to him, their hands grazing ever so gently as he takes it from her. He gives her a smile that makes her heart melt and she sits on the chair by the couch.  
_  
VAUGHN

Thanks Syd.  
  
SYDNEY

You're welcome.  
  
_There is an awkward silence as they both try to figure out what to say next.  
_  
VAUGHN & SYD simultaneously

So...


	4. Chapter 4

**4  
**  
INT. SYDNEY'S APARTMENT  
  
_Sydney and Vaughn stare at each other for what seems like eternity, until Sydney finally breaks their gaze and starts to speak_  
  
SYDNEY

Listen Vaughn, at the risk of sounding rude, I have to know why you're here.  
  
_Vaughn is about to speak when Sydney finishes her thought  
_  
SYDNEY

And yes, your car just happened to steer its way over to my apartment. But...[beat]...why are you _still_ here???  
  
_Vaughn is amused by how flustered she looks and gives her a sheepish grin_  
  
VAUGHN

Well...[beat]...you invited me in.  
  
_Sydney glares at Vaughn who swallows and chooses his next words carefully_  
  
VAUGHN

Syd, we need to talk  
  
_Sydney looks down...anticipating him to apologize for his display of affection earlier that evening. She waits for him to express his regret. She's not sure if her heart can take a blow from him right now. Sydney attempts to offer Vaughn a way out.  
_  
SYDNEY

Look Vaughn, I know...  
  
VAUGHN

I'm not sure you do.  
  
_Vaughn looks down_  
  
VAUGHN

I came here tonight because I wanted to talk to you. I needed to talk to you. There have been a lot of things left unsaid and I think it's about time we address the issues...  
  
_Sydney interrupts him_  
  
SYDNEY

Listen Vaughn, the last thing I need from you right now is rhetoric.  
  
_Vaughn looks hurt by this statement, but Sydney continues to speak_  
  
SYDNEY

If you came here to talk about what happened earlier this evening let me make it easier for you. Yes, I was relieved to see you...[beat]...because part of me had to know that you were really ok. I let my emotions get the better of me and I realize that you were just being who you are...a concerned friend.  
  
_"FRIEND." The word makes Vaughn flinch a little_  
  
SYDNEY

Rest assured that I thought nothing more about our hug.  
  
_Sydney says the last statement strained. She lets out a sigh and looks at Vaughn's face for a reaction. He looks at her intently and slowly hangs his head before he starts to speak_  
  
VAUGHN

So that's it. You just want to trivialize what happened to us tonight...what's been happening to us since North Korea?  
  
_Sydney is suddenly made livid by this statement and she gets up and starts pacing the living room as her anger takes over  
_  
SYDNEY

Trivialize!?! Vaughn, NOTHING happened. We hugged. That's it. Yes, ever since North Korea, it's been difficult to go on missions with you...[beat]...not because I finally realized how you still feel about me...but because every time we're put in an impossible situation where I could possibly lose you again, I'm ALWAYS ratcheted back to the reality that I've already lost you!!! So don't talk to me about what's been happening to _US_ since North Korea, because _I _have been dealing with this ever since that night I woke up in Hong Kong!  
  
_Sydney is now sobbing, but her face still held an angry and determined look. Vaughn looks at her from where he's sitting...his own eyes threatening to spill over the tears he's been keeping contained. He's hurting too and he's a little upset that she doesn't seem to notice._  
  
VAUGHN

That's not fair, Syd!  
  
_She gives him a steely look_  
  
SYDNEY

No, it's not! It's not fair that the Covenant stole 2 years of my life. It's not fair that I lost 2 of my best friends because of this job, while a man like Arvin Sloane gets to go on with his life outside of prison bars where he really belongs. It's not fair that the world kept moving on while I was dead. It's not fair that you found someone else to love and married her..[beat]...and it's certainly not fair that fate suddenly decided to throw me back into the equation without so much as an ally.  
  
_Vaughn gets off the couch and walks towards her with a defeated expression on his face_  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney, that's not true.  
  
SYDNEY

You're right. I have my dad and Dixon and Weiss and Marshall and Carrie  
  
_She looks down, pained by what she has to say next  
_  
SYDNEY

But I don't have you, Vaughn. And _THAT's_ not fair.  
  
_Sydney is sobbing uncontrollably now that she's admitted to herself and to the man that she loves, how broken she is without him._  
  
VAUGHN

Syd...  
  
_He couldn't take it anymore and he pulls her into his embrace, hugging her tighter than he's ever held her before. He was hanging for dear life it seemed and she just continued to sob. Vaughn presses his cheek against the side of her head as he starts to speak  
_  
VAUGHN

Sydney...[beat]... like I told you before..[beat]...I'M YOUR ALLY. Never question that.  
  
_Sydney backs away from Vaughn's embrace and slowly shakes her head in disagreement._  
  
SYDNEY

No, Vaughn. You WERE my ally. There was a time when I was certain that you'd do anything to keep me from harm. I'm sure even now, you still feel the need to protect me...but  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney...  
  
_That's the second time he's used her full name in the last 5 minutes and she's a little unnerved by his seriousness_  
  
SYDNEY

...but who's gonna protect me from you, Vaughn? Even I can't fool myself into believing that I can move on with my life without you. I don't understand why I'm unable to compartmentalize my feelings for you, when my whole life is about being able to tuck things away, only to be revealed at my say so. Every time I look at you...[beat]...every time  
  
_Vaughn looks at her pained expression while trying with all his might to defy the emotions that welled behind his eyes_  
  
SYDNEY

I am ripped apart, Vaughn. _EVERY_ time.  
  
_Sydney is now covering her face with both hands as tears escape through her fingers. Vaughn leads her to the couch and sits her down before he kneels in front her. He slowly pries her hands away from her face and lovingly wipes away her falling tears._  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney  
  
_Vaughn says her name so loving that it breaks her heart_  
  
SYDNEY

Vaughn, don't...  
  
VAUGHN

Dammit Syd, let me talk!  
  
_He looks down, angered that he let his frustration with the situation get the better of him. She is surprised by his animosity, but refrains from speaking._  
  
VAUGHN

I'm sorry Syd  
  
_He looks at her with a gentle expression on his face and she just nods in understanding_  
  
VAUGHN

I need you to listen to me, ok?  
  
_His eyebrows are furrowed and once again Sydney nods in understanding. Vaughn gives her a half-hearted smile._  
  
VAUGHN

All my life, I've tried to be an honorable man like my father.[beat] When I used to read his journals and saw how loyal he was to his job and to our family...how he never questioned orders and always obeyed the rules...I thought [beat]....I thought, THAT is the type of man I want to be. Someone who's dependent and trustworthy and virtuous. A man who stands up for what's right and never wavers.  
  
_Sydney looks at Vaughn with awe, but slowly turns away with a guilty look on her face. She remembers all of the times she had put him in a position that caused him to break the rules and question his morality and loyalties. She felt bad that she single handedly deconstructed this man before her. Vaughn notices the tears starting to well up in her eyes again, and knows why they are there...but he continues to speak...afraid that if he stops, he will not be able to get the courage to start again._  
  
VAUGHN

When we met...[beat]...that day you walked into the CIA headquarters with your red bozo hair and your swollen cheeks...[beat]...I literally thought you were a crazy person.  
  
_Sydney, who is still looking down just nods_  
  
VAUGHN

And then I read your statement, and I got to know you. The more I worked with you, the more fascinated I became with your strong will and your fighting spirit. I was also amazed by how vulnerable you really were. How fragile and emotional and caring the woman behind the spy is. You know all of this.  
  
_Vaughn is looking at her with is intense gaze (Ya know the one)_  
  
VAUGHN

You were always good at compartmentalizing...you had to be to do your job. You still are, regardless of what you may think. I never really quite understood how you were able to reconcile the woman with the spy...[beat]... but I vowed to myself that I would do whatever I could to make things easier for you. I didn't want you to feel like you had to choose between one or the other.  
  
_Sydney looks up at Vaughn with tears rolling down her face and she gives him the most endearing smile. He returns the favor and reminds himself to finish talking_  
  
VAUGHN

That's when I knew that I couldn't be like my father and be your handler too. Unlike him, I didn't care about rules and consequences, at least not where you were concerned. All I could think about was how I could keep you safe. I used to think that your dad was one of the most amoral people I knew in the agency. I had a hard time swallowing his decision to frame Russek and an even more difficult time acknowledging that he did it without a second thought. But he did it for you....and on that level, I understood the decision he made.  
  
_Sydney remembers how her dad framed Russek to divert SD-6's attention away from her. Another innocent person's life taken at her expense, she thought. Vaughn sees the wheels in her brain turning, but he continues on...determined to get out what he needs to say.  
_  
VAUGHN

Syd...[beat]...that night you fought Alison...  
  
_A solitary tear grazes Vaughn's cheek and Sydney wants nothing more than to reach out to him and shower him with her love. But she remains still_  
  
VAUGHN

Syd, I failed you that night. I should've walked you into your apartment and waited for you. I could've helped you fight Alison. I should've...  
  
_Sydney is horrified by his suggestions  
_  
SYDNEY

Vaughn, no! Don't do this. Let's not go through the "what if's"  
  
VAUGHN

But Syd, if I had just...  
  
SYDNEY

It's not your fault Vaughn. It's no one's fault [beat]...remember?  
  
_They both remember what he tells her on the runway before she left for Rome_  
  
**FLASHBACK**  
  
_Vaughn and Sydney gazing into each other's eyes before she escaped to Rome...both thinking this may be the last time they see each other for a long time_  
  
VAUGHN

What happened between us...the way it is...isn't anyone's fault Sydney. And even though everything's changed...[beat]...some things don't. I won't lose you twice.  
  
**end Flashback**  
  
_Sydney closes her eyes as she speaks_  
  
SYDNEY

I don't blame you Vaughn. I never did. Even when I accused you of losing faith...[beat]...I..  
  
_Sydney opens her eyes and looks straight into Vaughn's_  
  
SYDNEY

It just hurted. [beat]. It hurts. I wish it didn't...but it does.  
  
_Vaughn pinches the bridge of his nose and runs his hand through his hair as he takes a seat next to Sydney on the couch, grabbing her right hand into his and placing it on his lap...unable to reply to what she's just said. She looks at their entwined fingers and continues to speak_  
  
SYDNEY

You said you didn't know how I was able to reconcile the woman with the spy. [beat] With you...I never had to. The work we do is not easy...but you made it bearable for me. Even when we couldn't be together because of SD-6, you just had a way of making me feel like myself...even when I felt like I was drowning in all of my aliases, you were always able to find _ME_. But that's all different now.  
  
_Vaughn turns to face her with his puppy dog face that can just break your heart (augh! You know which one!!!)_  
  
VAUGHN

How?  
  
SYDNEY

The separation we had before was forced upon us by SD-6. _This_ separation...[beat]  
  
_Sydney looks down at Vaughn's wedding ring and he follows her gaze_  
  
SYDNEY

_This _one is a choice.


	5. Final Chapter

**5**  
  
INT. SYDNEY'S APARTMENT  
  
_Vaughn lets go of Sydney's hand and starts fidgeting with his wedding ring. He takes in a deep breath before he begins talking. Sydney just continues to look at her now solitary hand...wishing it were still entwined with Vaughn's  
_  
VAUGHN

Last Thursday...that night...[beat]  
  
SYDNEY

The anniversary of your father's death.  
  
_Vaughn looks at her and nods...remembering how surprised he was that she remembered...when his own wife didn't._  
  
VAUGHN

Yah. [beat] I couldn't sleep that night so I decided that I would go for a jog. I went to look around for my house keys...[beat]...but I found my father's old watch instead.  
  
_Sydney looks at him endearingly...remembering "the watch"_  
  
**FLASHBACK**  
  
_Sydney and Vaughn are in the warehouse where they always meet before she goes on assignment. Sydney is about to leave and as she's gazing at Vaughn one last time, he starts to talk_  
  
VAUGHN

This watch belonged to my father. It's broken now, but it used to keep perfect time. [beat] And when he gave it to me, he said "You could set your heart by this watch." [beat] It stopped October first. [beat] The day we met.  
  
**end FLASHBACK**  
  
_Vaughn's face strains as he continues to talk...and Sydney, realizing how difficult it is for him to talk about his father, reaches over and takes his hand back in hers. He looks stunned, but she just gave him a look motioning for him to continue._  
  
VAUGHN

I just sat there for a while...just remembering him...[beat]... and then Lauren got a phone call and found me sitting in the dark. I tried to tell her a story about my dad. But she had no idea what the hell I was talking about. I wanted to tell her everything that night...[beat]...about the watch...about my father...[beat]...about you.  
  
_Vaughn closes his eyes and is quiet for a moment. Sydney gives his hand a gentle squeeze and this brings him back._  
  
SYDNEY

Vaughn?  
  
VAUGHN

Syd, as I was sitting there in the dark, I kept thinking about what my father said...[beat]...how I could set my heart by that watch...and [beat]...and how it stopped.  
  
SYDNEY

October first.  
  
_Vaughn squeezes Sydney's hand  
_  
VAUGHN

October first.  
  
VAUGHN

I wanted to tell my _wife_...  
  
_Sydney flinches. Hearing him say "my wife" cut sharply through her...and he notices her wince a little. Vaughn takes Sydney's chin in his hand and lifts her face to look at him. She closes her eyes as a single tear falls down_  
  
VAUGHN

Syd...[beat]...open your eyes.  
  
_She complies_  
  
VAUGHN

I wanted to tell Lauren that night...what I wanted to tell you in North Korea...[beat]...  
  
_Vaughn looks at her longingly  
_  
VAUGHN

That as much as I love her...[beat]...all my life there has only been one person [beat]...one person for whom my heart beats.  
  
_Vaughn takes Sydney's hand and places it over his heart.  
_  
VAUGHN

Do you feel that?  
  
_Sydney can feel Vaughn's heart beating strongly and she nods._  
  
VAUGHN

YOU make that happen Syd. _Only you_. My heart...  
  
_His voice starts to break_  
  
VAUGHN

It only beats for you, Sydney. I never had a choice in it. [beat]...I couldn't will it to beat for anyone else.  
  
_There is a long pause as Sydney continues to feel Vaughn's heart beating beneath her touch  
  
Vaughn leaves Sydney's side, once again kneeling in front of her...taking both of her hands in his._  
  
VAUGHN

And when I thought you died that night...Syd...[beat]...when we got the DNA results that it was your body...my heart stopped beating.  
  
_Sydney is silently weeping as Vaughn struggles to continue._  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney, when I thought you were gone...[beat]...it nearly killed me. And then Hong Kong happened...and...  
  
_Vaughn is clearly straining to talk  
_  
VAUGHN

And then you were back. Only I couldn't be there for you...[beat]...because...well  
  
_Vaughn looks down at his wedding ring and gets a look of frustration_  
  
VAUGHN

Syd, you had every right to accuse me of losing faith  
  
SYDNEY

Vaughn...  
  
VAUGHN

...and when you came to my class that day...  
  
_Sydney remembers THAT day perfectly_  
  
**FLASHBACK**  
  
SYDNEY

You're a French teacher, huh?  
  
VAUGHN

Yeah.  
  
SYDNEY

I know that you're thinking about coming back... to the Agency. On the off chance that your hesitation is out of some courtesy to me, I... you can forget about it. I... I mean... I can handle you being there. So, don't worry about me.  
  
VAUGHN

The other day you said I gave up on us because I didn't have faith; that somehow you didn't mean enough to me.  
  
SYDNEY

When I said that, I was...  
  
VAUGHN

No, let me finish. After you died, I used to talk to you... like you were still around. Literally, out loud, whole conversations about... about nothing. The weather... Should I get a new car? Should... should I have another drink? Then one day... you started answering. I mean, I could hear you in my head... like you were right next to me, Sydney. And although rationally I knew I was a guy who... stayed up nights... drinking, talking to his dead girlfriend... Still, I couldn't stop. So, before you tell me you can handle my coming back to the CIA, there are two things you need to know: First... is that I was so in love with you... it nearly killed me. And second... that I don't regret moving on with my life.  
  
**end FLASHBACK  
**  
SYDNEY

Vaughn, you don't have to explain. I understand why you moved on. [beat] I did the same thing when Danny died...you don't have to  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney...[beat]...when I told you that I didn't regret moving on...[beat]...I lied.  
  
_Sydney looks at him in disbelief.  
_  
SYDNEY

Vaughn...  
  
VAUGHN

I was angry. [beat]...I was angry at you! Because you were right....  
  
_Vaughn looks down...  
_  
VAUGHN

Because I lost faith, Syd. I should never have given up on us...on you. I'm so sorry Sydney...  
  
_Sydney sees how guilt stricken and broken Vaughn is and drops his hands pulling him into her embrace. She is cradling Vaughn in her arms as they both silently shed tears of anguish  
_  
SYDNEY

Vaughn...I don't blame you...[beat]  
  
VAUGHN

You should  
  
SYDNEY

I don't. I won't.  
  
VAUGHN

I'm so sorry, Sydney. I'm so sorry.  
  
_Syd backs away from their embrace and she lifts his head and cups his face...speaking to him softly and lovingly..._  
  
SYDNEY

Your apologies are not what I need from you, Vaughn  
  
_He looks at her with pleading eyes  
_  
VAUGHN

Then what _do_ you need, Syd?  
  
SYDNEY

I need you with me here. _Right now_. Not when I woke up that night in Hong Kong, not the night that I died, but now. I have to know that you're here with me _now_, not because you think you should be or because you think you have some obligation to fulfill, but because you want to be.  
  
_Vaughn pulls himself up and rests his forehead against hers_  
  
VAUGHN

I'm here Syd.  
  
_He slowly takes his wedding ring off_  
  
VAUGHN

I _choose _to be here...[beat]..._with you_.  
  
_Sydney slowly backs away a little and rests her forehead on his._  
  
VAUGHN

Sydney, I can't promise you that the road ahead will be easy...[beat]...but I can promise you that I'll hold on if you will.  
  
_Sydney gently presses her lips against Vaughn's as tears of exhaustion, and relief, and joy stream down her face_  
  
SYDNEY

I'll hold on Vaughn...[beat]...I've _been _holding on.  
  
_Syd and Vaughn continue to hold on to one another as the music continues to play in the background._  
  
**I know you have a little life in you yet.  
I know you have a lot of strength left  
  
**_FINI _


End file.
